Tuesday, December 11, 2012

News Release: Alyssa Achieves Lavatorial Milestone




FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Contact: Sean Genovese, President
At approximately 7:00 p.m. this evening, Alyssa Anne Genovese successfully deposited feces in a white porcelain toilet. The achievement comes after weeks of failed attempts and several hundred dollars in corporate expenditures for disposable "Pull-Up" diapers. Alyssa's parents are very proud, but her sister, Kaitlyn, is beside herself with excitement as the achievement comes with a reward: the movie Barbie: A Fairy Secret.
The event unfolded this evening after both Kaitlyn and Alyssa were sent upstairs to prepare for showers. Alyssa informed the household she had to go potty and was immediately instructed by Daddy to proceed. Daddy, himself having to pee, adjourned to a separate bathroom. Minutes later, Alyssa was running about the second floor of the corporate headquarters asking for toilet paper. As Daddy responded to the request, Alyssa informed him, "and I pooped." Visual evaluation confirmed that indeed a "brownish turd" of approximately one inch by one and a half inches was present in the receptacle.
Once visual confirmation was made, Daddy made an audible announcement to which Kaitlyn immediately responded. A celebration ensued which included the "Poo-Poo Dance" performed Gangnam Style. Following the dance, jammies were installed on all minors and a celebration was held in the company's media room, where attendees enjoyed a screening of the newly acquired Barbie movie with popcorn and hot chocolate. 
This development is expected to improve year-end corporate margins as the need for "Pull-Ups" declines. Recent costs associated with bringing new products to market has contributed to lower earnings on sales of the company's most recent product offering, Not Quite There.



Sean Genovese Enterprises Inc. is a privately held company headquartered in Helotes, Texas. The company's product offerings include multiple blogs published via http://www.theroadscholars.com and print and digital media published through its imprint, No One Of Consequence. The most recent publication is Not Quite There, a book about journeys and finding your way. The book can be purchased in digital and Paperback formats from http://nqt.theroadscholars.com and through Amazon and Barnes & Noble web sites.

No comments: